Lighten Up
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Lighten up: easier said than done, but important to your wellbeing.
This week is about something we could all use a little more of: lightening up. Life is heavy, the world is messy, and navigating it all can be exhausting. As tough as it can be, you don’t have to — and you can’t even if you wanted to — carry it all.
Lightening up doesn’t mean ignoring what’s challenging, or pretending problems don’t exist. It’s about finding ways to let go of what doesn’t serve you so you can stay intact and have more peace, joy, and energy to enjoy what’s good. Here are four things that have helped me — and might help you too.
1. The book “The Four Agreements.”
If you haven’t read The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, I recommend it. For me it was a pretty big shift in perspective about a handful of critical things in my life. There’s some life-changing wisdom through four simple principles:
Be impeccable with your word.
Don’t take things personally.
Don’t make assumptions.
Always do your best.
The chapter on not taking things personally is especially powerful and eye-opening.
“Letting go doesn’t mean pretending something didn’t or isn’t happening; it means choosing not to keep carrying it and letting it control you.”
2. Let it go.
Often as humans we hold on to things —resentment, anger, frustration, other people’s problems or drama — that weigh us down. Letting go doesn’t mean pretending something didn’t or isn’t happening; it means choosing not to keep carrying it and letting it control you.
A simple mental exercise that helps me is visualize whatever is bothering me as a heavy object that I just set down and choose to not carry anymore. It’s simple and obvious but is a big help to me. And when I find myself ruminating and being consumed with thought and carrying it again, I simply put it down again.
Letting go takes practice, but the more you find what works for you to intentionally do it, the easier it gets. Releasing what’s not serving you makes room for peace and clarity.
“... if a driver cuts me off, I imagine that they just received devastating news which is why they’re distracted”
3. Assume the extreme best.
When someone cuts you off in traffic or snaps at you in a grocery store, it’s easy to get angry or upset and let it affect you. But what if you assumed the best instead?
This trick works for me a lot. For example, if a driver cuts me off, I imagine that they just received devastating news which is why they’re distracted. Or the rude stranger in the store is going through a really unimaginable personal crisis.
I practice crafting a narrative of thinking of whatever context in that person’s life would soften my heart in that moment to know, and choose to believe that about the situation. For me, it makes it relatively easy to let go of frustration and move on.
This practice isn’t about excusing bad behavior — it’s about protecting your own peace. When you assume the best of others, it can free yourself from swirling around in anger and resentment.
“Reminding yourself that you won’t always get to be here and experience being alive can help you focus on what’s truly important.”
4. Remember: you’re going to die.
Yes, this sounds heavy, but it’s actually freeing. You only have a limited time on this planet, so why waste it being constantly caught up in things that won’t matter in the grand scheme of your life?
Reminding yourself that you won’t always get to be here and experience being alive can help you focus on what’s truly important. For me it encourages me to soak up the beauty of life, embrace its messiness, and appreciate every moment — even the parts that suck about being human.
You don’t get to be here forever. Do what you can to identify and find ways to set down the things that aren’t necessary, and make at least a little more room for joy and peace in your life.
Related Blogs:
Being Unflappable is a Leadership Superpower
A Phrase to Create More Peace in Your Life
Mental Resiliency: Not Getting Worked Up
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This article was created by Galen Emanuele for the #culturedrop. Free leadership and team culture content in less than 5 minutes a week. Check out the rest of this month's content and subscribe to the Culture Drop at https://bit.ly/culturedrop
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